Be Better.

The Be Better message had a very humble beginning and was born out of despair, desire, determination, dedication and distain for wrong-doing.  It was a man's plea for grace and empowerment to rise above his faults and conquer the battles within himself.  He was a warrior, a man of a pure heart.  He is a hero. He was a human being. He is the son of parents who raised him to have courage and integrity.  To stand up for truth and the values within himself.  He is the husband of a woman whom was his best friend.  They lived together, laughed until it hurt, cried until it didn't, and never gave up on each other.  His four children still believe their daddy sets the sun out every morning and sits among the stars at night.  Larger than life!  LIFE...a gift taken far too early.    



Andrew Sterling Ashcraft - July 10, 2013
 

Andrew Sterling Ashcraft - Yarnell Hill, June 30, 2013

A small white, silicone band.  Two words...BE BETTER.  The simplicity is not only in it's appearance, but in it's message.  Andrew taught his family a lesson that will not soon be forgotten.  Rather, it has changed the way in which we conduct ourselves on a daily basis.  Why is a message that is so small and simple, so very impactful?

The message crosses over all boundaries, penetrates all hearts, applies to all cultures, knows no discrimination.  Each one of us, however wise or naïve, acclaimed or defamed, blissful or empty, straight and narrow or crooked as a question mark...we can all be better.  Better to our family and friends, better in our community, and better to ourselves.

BE BETTER BANDS

When Andrew Ashcraft put on his Be Better Band in January of 2013, he vowed to wear it until the day he died as a constant reminder and emblem of his commitment to being better each day than he was the day before.  He taught by word and example that we should treat each other better in our home, treat others that we come into contact with better each and every day...simply, BE better.  He understood the concept of becoming refined, strengthened, and empowered, line upon line and precept upon precept.  That life is about the journey and not simply the destination.  By living this principle, Andrew blessed the lives of so many around him.  He smiled at strangers when it would've been easier to walk idly by.  He opened doors for others when it could've closed on them.  He embraced opportunities to serve and never turned his back on a friend.  His little acts of kindness created a masterpiece of character and valor upon which his legacy now stands.  He was heroic in his profession and his ultimate sacrifice, bur first he was a hero in the home.  This was the strength of the man Andrew Ashcraft.  He developed his wings by lifting others burdens.  He walked through fire to protect others safety.  He sacrificed his very life in an effort to teach others how to begin living theirs.

On June 30, 2013, more was taken from 19 families than we could have ever imagined.  The horror of the shedding of tears, the waling of heartache, and the upending of lives as we knew them will forever be seared into our souls.  We would never hold our loved ones again or see them walk through our front door.  Andrew's smile would never again be seen in this life.  Mothers and fathers burying their sons, wives going to bed alone, accompanied only by the chill of the unruffled covers on his side of the bed.  Children developing relationships only with who their dad once was and visiting him at a cemetery rather than receiving butterfly kisses and wrestling on the floor after family dinner. 

The immense loss of that day also included the physical remnants of the men we sent off to fight that blaze.  So little was recovered that we found treasure in any scrap piece of material that we could find in the area.  We would never see their bodies, we would never touch their lifeless hands, we would never kiss their cheeks or whisper in their ears that we'll see them on the other side.  We were left without closure, we were left without answers, we were left to battle denial while completely broken hearted. 

Then...a miracle! A small, silicone band...once white, now charred, but intact.  How could it be?  The flames of that fatal fire caused rocks to crumble and medal to melt. How then could this silicone band come back to the family of our heroic firefighter?  Everyone may have their reason, be it coincidence or otherwise, but I call it a small miracle and tender mercy.  Perhaps God understood that his wife would need to hold it on the nights where she faced the crossroad of "Be Bitter or Be Better".  Perhaps He knew that his children would be blessed to see that their Daddy always kept his promises and the promise he made them to wear the band until the day he died was no exception.  Perhaps his mother and father needed to have a message that they could spread to the world in an effort of continuing their life with their precious son as a continual part of it.  Or perhaps the reason was to have a forum like this to talk about the beauty of the human heart, to allow the freedom to forgive ourselves and shed the weight of past mistakes, becoming better each day.  Whatever the reason, it has led us to this point...

We have been overwhelmed by the goodness of people from all over the world.  The cards, condolences, donations, hugs, prayers, love, and encouragement we have received have been inspiring, moving, and have left us with a desire to pay it forward.  We wish to give back, in some small way, to those who have selflessly, graciously, and heroically blessed our family over the past two years.  The fact that I have the strength to put my thoughts in writing now is born of the many shoulders who have helped carry my burdens and the prayers who have buoyed up my sorrow.  I am better today than I was yesterday...thanks to all of you.  It is these individuals, families, and organizations who offered their assistance in a time that we were so desperately in need, that truly understand Andrew's message to Be Better.  They not only understand it but live it.  Such beautiful irony can be found in Andrew losing his life to save the lives of strangers; and in turn, strangers have taken it upon themselves to save the lives of his family. 

BE BETTER BRIGADE...

Andrew's four children, Ryder Sterling Ashcraft (7), Shiloh Ashcraft (6), Tate Andrew Ashcraft (4) and Choice Crockett Ashcraft (3), and I, their mother and Andrew's widow, have taken off on a mission to highlight these every day heroes.  We are traveling by bus to all 50 states and stopping by at least one incredible donor in each state who helped to bless our lives over the past two years.  We want to hug them, learn from them, and celebrate the goodness of their hearts.  We want to present them with a replica of Andrew's Be Better Band and thank them for living this principle in their lives.  This blog will be a forum to share their stories and recognize them for being so thoughtful. 

Please take a moment to read of these individuals whom we are recognizing, and in turn think of people in your life that have lifted your spirit today.  Have you expressed your gratitude to them?  Have you thanked them for encouraging you to Be Better?  The time is now.  Don't let the opportunity go by without letting those you love know how incredible they are.  Together, by performing acts of kindness, we can SPREAD THE BETTER!